


A part of my soul

by Chevalier_Barthelemy



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Best Friends, Canon-Typical Violence, Eventual Smut, F/M, First Kiss, Fiveya Secret Santa 2020, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Possessive Number Five | The Boy, Pseudo-Incest, Soulmates, Survival, fiveya - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:09:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28358301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chevalier_Barthelemy/pseuds/Chevalier_Barthelemy
Summary: Vanya never considered herself lucky, quite the opposite. Being the ordinary one in a family of famous, superpowered siblings, she is the furthest thing from lucky. The only thing she considered herself lucky in is her soulmate Five. Unfortunately, even that is taken from her.When Five disappears into the future, she is devastated, until she realizes that they can still hear each other. Determined, Vanya sets out to find a way to bring him home, one way or another.
Relationships: Allison Hargreeves/Luther Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy/Vanya Hargreeves
Comments: 3
Kudos: 39





	A part of my soul

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sunchime](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunchime/gifts).



> 🎅 🎅 🎅 
> 
> First of all, I would like to thank Clover for giving me such a wonderful list of prompts that lead me to write this for her!! I really hope you like this first chapter, and what’s to come. I really admire all your fiveya works so it was a pleasure to write this for someone as talented as you! I hope you have a merry Christmas and happy holidays! 
> 
> Now, I also gotta thank my beta readers, who I’ve been bothering a lot with questions! First I want to thank ellaphunt19 who is always giving me such great advice, and ideas! And of course, thanks to Fiveyaas who is the real fiveya mvp, as she is always giving me, and everyone in this community wonderful advice and support!

_ Every heart sings a song, incomplete until another heart whispers back. Those who wish to sing always find a song. At the touch of a lover, everyone becomes a poet. _

_ Plato _ . 

* * *

Number Five was crying, again. His wail reverberated through the halls and rooms until it reached him. 

Putting down his book, Pogo gave out a sigh and rose from his chair, a tired look in his eyes. It had only been a month since Master Hargreeves brought the children he adopted home, and it wasn’t getting any easier with time. To say that his life had been completely turned upside down upon their arrival would be an understatement. 

The Umbrella mansion, usually quiet and peaceful, seeing as it had only housed two residents, he and Master Reginald, was filled with cries and the loud clicking of heels against the wooden floors as the various nannies went to and from the nursery to attend to the children. 

For years Pogo had known about Master Reginald’s plan, about the young superhero team he wanted to create, his answer to all the evil in the world. It was a commendable plan, and one he stood for. However, despite Sir Reginald’s plan being explained to him in detail, for some reason it never occurred to him the challenges they would face. Starting with having seven infants under one roof. 

Despite the children’s extraordinary qualities that had started to manifest, they  _ were _ still infants and therefore did what any infant would; they cried. For Pogo that wasn’t a problem, he knew it would happen. They had prepared for it by hiring countless nannies. What he didn’t realize was that if one baby cried, it would always start a chain of reaction as all the other babies were awoken from their naps and would join in on the to cry. At which point, they would have seven crying babies in their hands. 

Shuffling to the large nursery, Pogo cringed as the cries only grew louder the closer he got. There wasn’t a doubt in him that the cries belonged to Number Five. With the sharp edge his cries had, making his bones rattle, it was hard not to become familiar with it.

Arriving at the nursery, he stopped by the door, looking into the large room where seven cots were stationed in a semi-circle. Sir Reginal had the nursery built a couple of months ago, awaiting the children’s arrival. Well, if _ nursery  _ was the right word. If Pogo didn’t know better, he’d say the room was more of a science lab rather than a nursery.

There were no toys, no pictures of animals on the walls or  _ anything  _ a nursery might contain. No, there was none of that. Instead, large data processing machines lined the walls, thick cords that were connected to them branched out and grew thinner as they disappeared inside each and every cot. What little space that remained on the walls was occupied with screens, relaying the data. 

Gazing through his half-moon glasses, Pogo followed nanny Gertrude as she took one bottle from the counter and made her way towards Number Five’s cot with haste. 

Craning his neck, Pogo got a glimpse of the wailing baby.

Kicking in Gertrude’s arm, the boy’s face was red from exertion, his eyelids tightly shut, hiding the striking green eyes behind them. His little hands formed into fists as he cried with what he could only describe as pertinence. 

The boy cried and cried in Gertrude’s arms, even when she tried to give him his bottle he practically slapped it away, tiny brows furrowed as he glared at her, almost as if offended.

Pogo sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. He was not at all surprised by Number Five’s behaviour. 

As the days went by, Pogo found out more and more about each child, finding that each posed their own challenge. 

Number One, a large, strong baby whose power they quickly learned was super-strength, would sometimes take their nanny’s finger in his hand and snap them in half with an ease that was almost frightening. Because of that, they had to be careful on how he was held. 

Number Two, however, was a little easier to deal with, not to mention that his powers had not yet manifested, but he was still a very fussy child. Crying every time Number One cried, sometimes Pogo thought he saw it as a competition on who could cry louder. 

Number Three, whose ability they learned was mind control, would somehow compel their nanny to bring her an extra bottle of milk. None of them knew how she did it, but she did it with enough frequency that they had to monitor her.

Number Four, whose powers have also not manifested yet, is nearly always crying. Pogo noted that he was always looking into the distance as if he could see something they could not.

Number Six, whose powers were sprouting tentacles from his stomach, almost gave one of their nannies a heart attack when he first manifested them. Because they never knew when he would use his power, they had to hold him when was in a relaxed state. 

Number Seven, who they were still unsure what her powers were exactly, seeing as she could do many things, was always breaking things without touching them. In one instant she sent a nanny flying when she tried to give her medicine. She was the one Master Hargreeves was always monitoring.

Yes, all the children posed their own challenges, however, out of all the children, Number Five had to be the most difficult one. His power, spatial jumping, made it particularly difficult. Pogo wouldnever forget the day they learned about his powers. One day, when the nannies went to check on him, they gave out a shriek when they found his cot empty. 

Frantically, everyone searched for the boy everywhere, Pogo looked through the cameras to make sure no one had come in and kidnapped him but saw nothing except for a blue flash coming from his cot. The whereabouts and sudden disappearance of the boy became so mysterious that even Master Hargreeves had joined in on the search. Eventually, they found him, but only after he started crying. Out of all places, Number Five had found his way into the oven.

That had not been the first time the boy had teleported. He did it often as if to spite them. Of course, he and the nannies would worry. What if he found his way into a more dangerous place? Like the road? Thankfully, it didn’t come to that. Master Reginald put a tracking bracelet on him, that would also prevent him from jumping too far. 

Luisa, the nanny carrying snivelling Number Three, who had been awakened by her brother’s cry, made her way to Gertrude, her brows knit together, but she had a gentle spark in her eyes as she took in Five. 

“I think he’s just a bit lonely, perhaps we should put him with one of the other babies?” She asked, gazing at Pogo seeing as he was the one in charge of the children. 

Pogo did not argue with her logic, for he knew that she might just be right. None of the nannies knew, but Number Five did not come to this world alone. So it was possible that the boy is just not used to being on his own, that he needed company.

Thinking logically, he told the nanny to put him with Number One, seeing as they were both twins. However, as soon as Number Five left her arms and he turned his tiny head to look at a wide-eyed Number One, Number Five gave out an ear-shattering wail. 

Gertrude grabbed Five as quickly as she could, hoping to ease the crying child, but the damage had been made. 

Not giving up, seeing as Number Five was crying so loudly that he was sure he was going to burst their eardrums, Pogo instructed her to put Five with another child, Number Seven. Five being such a fussy, energetic child, he hoped that Seven’s soft, quiet personality would soothe him. After all, Number Seven was the quietest out of all her siblings, something he is thankful for, seeing as every time she cried every lightbulb in the house breaks. 

All of them held their breaths as Gertrude lowered Five inside Seven’s cot, glaring up at her defiantly, crying as he did. However, as soon as she let him go, and he realized that there was someone else there with him, he instantly stopped crying. Pogo and the other nannies watched with rapt attention as Number Five’s brows softened as he gazed at Number Seven. Number Seven likewise turned to look at her new companion, eyes wide with interest. 

Cooing, Number Seven stretched out her tiny hand towards Five, and their breaths hitched, thinking that this was when the boy would start wailing again. But they were all proven wrong. When Seven’s tiny fingers made contact with the tiny puff of brown hair upon the boy’s head, he merely blinked. But even more shocking still was that he leaned into her touch, eyes closing as he fell asleep while Number Seven continued to play with his hair. 

Pogo could not believe his eyes.

After witnessing that, he went straight to Master Hargreeves. 

**_Journal entry September 3rd, 1989_ **

_ ‘Today we learned that Number Five, the most difficult of all the children, seems to have an affinity for Number Seven, much more than he does with his own fraternal twin. The nannies see nothing out of the ordinary with their sudden connection, but Master Hargreeves believed otherwise.’  _

_ ‘Upon closer examination of Number Five and Number Seven’s brain activity when they are together, Master Hargreeves has come upon something rather shocking.’  _

_ ‘The connection that the nannies believed to be a mere bond formed by friendship between infants runs much deeper than that. Upon analyzing both individuals’ brain waves, we were surprised to discover that when both children are together, their brain waves mimic the other. It is remarkable to see how their brain activity matches. In all my years of study, I have seen nothing like this before. However, Master Hargreeves does not share my amazement.’  _

_ ‘He does not want any distraction to come in the way of his plans, of the Umbrella Academy, and a soul bond will prove to be a distraction. Unfortunately, there is not much anyone can do. As yet, there are no known ways to break a soul bond, and even Master Hargreeves does not possess the knowledge either. However, that doesn’t mean he won’t try other methods.’ _

_ ‘After learning about their bond, Master Hargreeves made it very clear that Number Five and Seven are to be kept apart. They are not to share a cot, nor are they ever allowed to interact with each other. All these new rules are put in place to ensure that the bond does not grow stronger, and while I understand Master’s decision, I wish he would just let the children remain together. After Five and Seven got separated, Five won’t stop crying and my migraine has worsened.’  _

_ ‘But it makes me wonder, what fate has planned for these two children? Soulmates are a rare thing in today’s age, and yet out of all the billions of people, their soulmate had to be someone living under the same roof. Mathematically speaking, it almost seems impossible. That is why, despite being someone that does not believe in such things, I cannot see it as anything else but fate.’ _

* * *

_ 13 years later _

Seven was standing by the window in her room, violin in her hands, fingers lazily pressing down on the strings of the neck with ease, arm moving back and forth as the bow brought the notes to life.

It was gloomy outside, rain beating down on the window, not at all disrupting her music but amplifying it, as if it were another instrument playing along. 

Lying down on her bed was Five, yet another physics book lying open on the side and a notebook propped against his knee, his hand flying over the papers as he scribbled down equations. Not wanting to disrupt her, he was as quiet as he could possibly be as she played. The only sound that she could hear coming from him was his soft humming in his head. 

To an outsider looking in, it would seem like they were completely inside their own separate worlds, not at all acknowledging the other, but that wasn’t right. 

Despite being engrossed in their own thing, she and Five were brushing each other’s conscience against the other, just a small nod of the other’s presence inside their head. Her siblings would often remark on how distracting that must be, to have another constant presence in one’s head. After all, none of them have soulmates of their own, not that they were aware of, so a soulbond baffled them. Truthfully, it kind of baffled her at times too. 

When they were kids, she didn’t know what the connection between her and Five meant; it was just something they always had and was always discouraged by their father. Neither she nor five understood why, but father always belittled their bond, always kept them apart and refused to explain why they, out of everyone in the house, had it. She suspected that if Five wasn’t naturally curious and rebellious, neither would have learned the truth as he broke into dad’s private library one day and took a book from it. They were ten at the time. Ten years old when they finally understood what their bond was, what it meant, and what it was called. Soulmates. 

Seven finished the piece with a little flourish of the bow, and Five ended his silence.

“Do you know that when you play, the notes fly through your head at an incredible speed?” Five asked, eyes still glued on his book, pencil scribbling away. “Your brain barely has the chance to register them, but your fingers have no problem executing the notes.” 

Seven turned to face him as she put her violin on the opened case on the bed. Her finger cramping. That was enough practice for today.

“It’s the same with you,” she remarked with a soft smile. “You write faster than your mind can keep up.” 

He hummed in agreement, a little smug, and Seven rolled her eyes. 

After closing the case and propping it against the wall next to her desk, she plopped herself on the bed next to him and gazed down at his notebook.

As always, the countless numbers and symbols were incomprehensible to her. Finding no interest in his writing, no matter how awed she was at how elegant his numbers were, she reached out for his left hand that rested against his side. 

Five didn’t even stop or flinch when her hands made contact with him, the usual electric current thrumming through them as it always did every time they touched. Seven however sighed a little as relief washed over her, the stress of the day washing away with a simple touch. 

Lifting his hand towards her, she turned it wrist side up, allowing her to see the black umbrella tattoo, the skin around it still slightly red from soreness. 

It had been a couple of weeks since her siblings got them, receiving them right after their third successful mission. She recalled the memory clearly. Their usual classes were interrupted as Pogo instructed them to go to the foyer. All of them. At first, she had been excited, thinking that they might include her in something, but then their father announced that the six of them were getting a tattoo while she got to stand to the side and watch. Seven recalled the anger and pain she felt towards her father purposely calling her down to watch as if he enjoyed rubbing it in. 

From the grand staircase, she had watched as one by one her siblings took their seats on the leather chair and got their tattoos until it was Five’s turn. 

Five, the cockiest and arrogant of her siblings, was always talking big. When he sat on the chair, with the tattoo artist looming over him as he placed the machine on his skin, he didn’t so much as flinch or complain. To everyone else, it seemed like he was completely at ease, feeling no pain. However, she knew just how much pain he was in. Could hear him curse in his head every time the tiny needles pierced his skin.

“Does it still hurt?” She asked, her fingers an inch from touching it.

“Not as much as before,” he responded, eyes glued on the notebook as he continued to write. 

After they got their tattoos, all her siblings went to the side to lick their wounds, except for Five who sought her out. Despite him assuring her it didn’t hurt, she still hugged him and stroked the back of his head when they were out of their father’s watchful eyes. She knew he was in pain, could feel it, and yet she wished she could have gotten one too. Despite the pain they clearly went through, she couldn’t help but envy him and her siblings. She wished she too could have joined them. That she could have a matching umbrella tattoo on her wrist, something to show others she was one of them, that she belonged.

“He branded us like cattle Seven, there’s nothing to be jealous about,” he grumbled, his tone a little sharp after having heard her thoughts. 

Seven sighed, not at all taken aback by the sharpness in his voice.

She knew that he wasn’t brushing away her emotions, he just had a strange way of dealing with such things. While most of their siblings saw a cold, arrogant prick as they would unfairly call him, she saw how caring and thoughtful he was. Despite their bond, that part of him had taken her some time to fully understand, taking his blunt and harsh words personally, when in fact it was just the way he was. That didn’t mean he didn’t care any less, she could feel how much he cared. And besides, she was always the exception. 

Pencil freezing against the paper, he turned his head up and met her eyes. Seven frowned when she noticed the dullness in them, and the way his jaw tightened. 

“Even when we leave this place, we’ll always have something to remind us of it, to remind us we’re nothing more than his property. That he just bought us off the streets.”

Taking her left hand, he turned it to reveal her unblemished, soft skin.

“You won’t have that problem, Seven,” he told her. His thumb stroked her bare skin. “You won’t have something physical connecting you to this place.” 

Seven blinked and dropped her gaze. 

She understood where he was coming from, but she still didn’t see it that way, yet she didn’t argue with him either. Despite living under the same roof with the same family, they both lead such different lives, with vastly different views on things. 

Clearing his throat softly, ending her train of thoughts, he took his hands from her, leaving her missing the physical connection almost instantly. 

“Which brings me to my research.” 

Raising her head, Seven cocked it to the side, eyes narrowing a little as she felt Five barricade his mind behind a thick barrier. Confusion swirled inside her. Clearly, whatever he wanted to say next, he wanted to keep his thoughts private about it. 

Despite how strange it felt to be disconnected from him even for a second, she never got angry when he shut off the connection, nor did he when she did. Despite their bond, they both needed their privacy from time to time. 

She mainly did it whenever she was taking a shower or getting changed, mortified by the thought that Five would look into her head and see what she was seeing by mistake. She knew that wasn’t likely to happen. They both learned how to turn a blind eye to what they were both seeing, being far too distracting. But the possibility was still there, and she didn’t want to risk it. 

Five, however, did it more often, especially when he was on missions. He would tell her it was because he needed to focus, but she knew better. He didn’t want her seeing their missions, almost as if he wanted to protect some innocence in her. But apart from missions, he did it during training, or when he was deep in his research. She didn’t blame him. More than any of their siblings, Five required his privacy the most. He kept to his room, reading or writing, there was no other form of entertainment for him other than his research, or that was what he wanted everyone to think. But Seven knew better, she knew that his research wasn’t just a way to pass the time. He was up to something.

“I’ve been thinking,” he started, hands tapping on his notebook, giving away how nervous he was. It only made the confusion rise within her. “I’ve been training a lot lately, practicing my spatial jumps. I’ve gotten pretty good too, I even doubled the amounts of time I can jump.” 

Seven nodded, knowing that he was rambling, but not calling him out for it. However, whatever it was he wanted to say, it made her nervous. 

Taking in a deep breath, he regathered himself, expression schooled into a determined one.

“Tomorrow, I’m gonna time travel.”

Seven froze on the spot, her eyes widening exponentially as the usual fear and uncertainty she felt every time he brought up time travel rose inside her, taking a hold of her. 

“All my research, all my training, it has been leading me to this moment Seven,” he told her, turning on the spot to face her fully, not seeing the shock and fear that coloured her face, or looking past it.

Forcing herself to respond, she blinked, trying to clear her mind. 

“Wha-but- Dad said you’re not allowed.”

“I know,” he shrugged. “But I’m trying it, anyway.” 

Her brows slanted, her finger balled the sheets inside her fist. This was far from the first time Five has brought up time travel. He has been fascinated with the thought of it ever since they were very little, and every time he talked about it with so much enthusiasm, she always felt dread. She didn’t really understand it, but she knew how dangerous it was, how he could get stuck if he wasn’t careful.

She wasn’t like Five, so confident and willing to take chances, especially when so much was on the line.

She took his hand, needing the bond, even though he was shutting her out. Just touching his hand was enough.

“But Five, he- “

“Seven,” he cut her off, voice lowering, frustration slipping through it. “If we always do what Dad says, we will never leave this house, we will never be rid of him!”

He waved his hand around him, brows furrowed, his nose flared. Although she knew he wasn’t angry at her, it still stung her a little. 

“This is a prison, and I for one refuse to stay here forever,” he hissed, his anger ( and she knew was strong towards their father) clear in his voice, making the memory of a week ago come back to her. 

They had all gathered around the dining table for dinner, as usual. 

It was not the first time Five had interrupted during a meal. Being the most outspoken, and rebellious out of all of them, and fearless, (for one required an incredible amount of bravery to stand up to their father,) he often spoke out of turn and the only time they ever saw their father outside his study was during meal times. Still, despite not being at all new to his outbursts, every one of their siblings, including her, had tensed up when he threw an overfilled file on his plate, cutlery clattering. 

With all his determination, chest rising and falling, he had told, not asked, their father he was going to learn how to time travel. Their father’s reaction, as expected, was harsh and belittling. 

‘ _ You’re not ready Number Five, and I fear you may never be ready,’  _ their father had said.  _ ‘Your skills are pitiful and your intelligence is insufficient. To achieve a successful jump in time, you will need both.’ _

She knew that had hurt Five, especially when father had said that right in front of the entire family. Their brothers and sister, while they understood how cruel their father could be, couldn’t help but snigger when Five, oozing all the arrogance that he did, was brought down a peg. 

Five had spatial jumped to his room after their father dismissed him. When she went to his room, she found torn, crumpled papers littering the floors, books thrown around the room. It was an absolute mess, and in the middle of that mess was Five, not crying as she always did whenever father belittled her, but tearing papers out of his notebook, face red from anger, veins popping out. She had seen many of his outbursts before, even had to bear the brunt of a few of them, but she had never seen him like that before. It had also made her fearful and unsure. 

Crying she could deal with, she knew what to do, having cried enough times herself. But anger? She just didn’t know how to deal with that, much less the level he had experienced. Nevertheless, she had wanted to keep him company, to support him, but when he softly asked her to leave she did, too scared of getting burned by all that anger.

When she had closed the door, he had shut his side of the bond off to the point where she couldn’t even feel his presence. Making her feel more alone than ever before. She had cried herself to sleep that night.

The next morning she woke up with the bond fully restored and with Five sitting on her bed, all the anger he had felt the day before drained out of him. In its stead, there was a determination she had never seen before in his eyes, the same look he has now. And now she understood that instead of shooting him down completely, their father had made him even more determined to time travel, and that sent a shiver down her spine. For she knew that once Five made up his mind, nothing could change it. 

Five’s brows softened a little when he seemed to notice the fear in her eyes, his hand turning in her grasp to hold her hand in return. 

“You gotta trust me Seven, I know I can do it,” he breathed. “You just gotta trust me,” he repeated a little more softly as if pleading with her. 

Seven clenched her jaw. She wanted to tell him it wasn’t that she didn’t have faith in him, she couldn’t have more faith in anybody in her life, but that she feared for him. That she hated their father as much as he does, but unless he gave the go-ahead that he is ready, she wasn’t comfortable letting him time travel. After all, their father may be a lot of things, but she doubted that he would warn Five not to do it unless there really was a danger to it. She also wanted to ask him what would happen if he got stuck, what would happen to them, what would happen to  _ her _ ?

She wanted to say all those things, but she knew it would fly over his head. Words were meaningless now, not with how dead set he was. The only way was to distract him, to get his mind from it. But the question was, how?

“Dad was wrong, I’ve done the calculations, there are no dangers. I’m more than ready and- “

Before he could finish, before her mind could catch up with the idea that popped inside her head, she leaned forward and closed the space between them. Before either of them realized what was happening, her lips connected with his. 

Caught off guard, they both froze solid on the spot. The barrier he had crumbled to pieces in a mere instant. Confusion coursed through them both, only to disappear and be replaced by something else, something neither had felt before. 

Seven always thought those sparks and the fluttering feeling rising from the pit of the stomach people described were fake, that it was just an over-exaggeration, but she was so wrong. She felt all those things and more.

Although it was awkward and innocent, as soon as her lips made contact with his lips it was like electricity thrummed through her entire body, the connection blossoming within them. Like their very souls were humming within them, overcome with joy at the connection as they tangled and twisted against each other, connecting them in a way they had never experienced before. 

When their lips separated and the kiss ended a mere few seconds after it started, she felt an overwhelming need to close the distance again, as if her very soul was begging to be reconnected with its other half. But Seven fought the urge as she opted to rest her forehead against him. Eyes closing, overwhelmed with her own feelings and his. 

Despite the shortness of the kiss, they were both left breathless, their breaths mingling together. Their hearts pounding in their chests, the fluttering feeling not showing any signs of dwindling. After all, that had been their first kiss. 

“Five,” she mumbled his name, unsure if she had actually said it or if she said it in her mind. It didn’t matter, either way, he knew exactly what she was feeling. The fear, anxiety but paradoxically the all-encompassing emotion that spread around her which she could only describe as love. 

“Don’t do it, please don’t do it,” she begged, grabbing his hands and linking their fingers. 

Mind a jumbled mess, Seven struggled with what he was feeling, especially when his emotions were so tangled with hers, making it difficult to differentiate which were her emotions and which were his. But after a second, as their souls unravelled, she could make out the hesitation, nervousness, joy, sadness, as well as a powerful emotion she couldn’t quite place. 

Pressing their foreheads closer, his brows tickled her as he furrowed them, his eyelashes brushing against hers as they opened, prompting her to do the same. She gazed into his impossibly green eyes, noticing how much his cheeks had grown red when she roamed her eyes over his face. 

“Seven…” he sighed, almost as a prayer, or a plea she wasn’t sure, but she didn’t ask, nor did he say anything. 

Instead, they both remained on the same spot for what felt like ages. 

She knew kissing was something he has had in his mind for some time now, the wayward thought making its way to her before he could stop it. Though she wanted the same thing, fantasied about kissing Five late at night and she was alone with her thoughts, she was shocked to find that he wanted the same time. Sure, they were soulmates, but that didn’t mean that they had to be together romantically. She heard that some soulmates settled with just being best friends, and with how extraordinary he was, she thought it would be the case with them. How could the famous prodigy Number Five ever want anything  _ more _ with her?

Seven took a deep breath, trying to settle her beating heart and emotions, but failing. For behind the giddy joy of finally kissing him, she also felt terrible. 

She knew it was wrong, that she was no better than Dad for manipulating him, knowing that Five could not and should not be shackled to anything. But what other choice did she have? Now that they had kissed, she hoped that maybe it would encourage him to not to time travel, that it’ would show him he had everything he needed right here, that he didn’t have to leave. That they just needed each other in this crappy situation they were in.

Unfortunately for Seven, she had always been a bit of a dreamer. And in real life, dreams tended not to come true. 

* * *

The next morning, during breakfast, she was calm as they all made their way to the dining room, sure that Five wouldn’t try something drastic. After the kiss, they had laid down on the bed facing each other, not saying a word, just enjoying the peace and quiet in each other’s company. 

Taking her seat at the opposite end of the table, she concentrated on her food, mind brushing Five’s ever so gently. Just like her. He seemed calm, his mind blank, a complete contrast to how it usually was. If she had to describe his mind she would describe it as messy, akin to that of the sea, turbulent and demanding. It was strange for it to be so calm, almost morbid. However, the calmness didn’t last as his mind grew more and more turbulent, prompting her to look up from her plate. 

Unlike everyone else around the dining table, Five wasn’t dutifully eating his food. Instead, he was gazing at their father, his lips twisted downwards into an angry expression. 

Seven felt a bad feeling twist inside her. 

She tried to look inside his mind to see what was wrong, but apart from the rising anger within him, she couldn’t find her answer. So when Five stabbed his knife against the table, the bang calling them all to attention; it made her jump a little from surprise.

“Number Five?” Their father said, not at all surprised, keeping his attention on his food. 

“I have a question,” Five hissed, and Seven tightened her hold on her fork. 

“Knowledge is an admirable goal, but you know the rules. No talking during mealtimes.” Their father raised his fork to stress his point. “You’re interrupting Herr Carlson.” 

Usually, whenever any of her other siblings showed any defiance, they quickly shut their mouths soon after, biting their tongue lest they anger their father. However, Five was not like that. 

Sneer pulling at his lips, Five defiantly shoved his plate away, telling Father that they weren’t done. Meanwhile, Seven felt like her heart was going to jump out of her chest. What was he doing?

“I want to time travel.” 

It was like her very blood had frozen solid in her veins. Did her words mean nothing to him? Did the kiss? 

“No,” their father quickly answered. And Seven knew Five wasn’t just going to let it go. 

“But I’m ready. I’ve been practicing my spatial jumps, just like you said.” 

Rising from his chair, Five spatial jumped, reappeared beside father, who was not at all shocked nor did he once look up from his food.

“See?” 

“A spatial jump is trivial when compared to the unknowns of time travel,” he informed him, with his usual patronizing tone. “One is like sliding along the ice, the other is akin to descending blindly into the depth of the freezing water and reappearing as an acorn.” 

For a second Five just stood there, and Seven thought, she  _ hoped _ , that he would just leave it at that. However, when she felt the fiery anger and confusion rise within him, her heart began to beat faster. 

“Well, I don’t get it,” he responded softly, as if ashamed to admit that he didn’t understand something. 

“Hence the reason you’re not ready.” 

Instead of raging at their father, as she knew he was close to doing, Five briefly turned to gaze at her, lips downturned, brows furrowed, hurt and anger clear in his face upon being shut down, and ridiculed in front of their siblings yet again. It made something twist inside her. 

“ _ Five please don’t,”  _ she begged with her mind but before she could say anything else, or try to convince him Five shut his side of the connection off without so much as a blink and turned to father once more.

It was like he had shut a door right on her face, leaving her along with nothing more than her frustration and anxiety. 

“I’m not afraid,” he hissed.

“ _ Please Five, stop,”  _ she tried to beg, shoving her conscience against the wall that separated them with frustration. But try as she might, he couldn’t hear her. 

“Fear isn’t the issue.” The only sign of frustration their father showed towards his more rebellious son, was the quickening of his knife as he cut his food. “The effects it might have on your body, even on your mind, are far too unpredictable.” 

Suddenly putting his cutlery down, making them clatter against the plate, he finally craned his neck to acknowledge Five. 

“Now, I forbid you to talk about this anymore.” 

It’s like the world had stopped as she gazed at Five, not so much as breathing, waiting for what Five would do. 

Pursing his lips, his nose twitched. His body tensed like a bow. It shocked her when he suddenly turned and walked away. And she wasn’t the only one. Everyone turned from their plates to look at Five as he left. Their brother, although rebellious, had never dared to do such an act of defiance.

For Seven, it was like everything had gone absolutely quiet for her. She couldn’t hear her father bark at Five to come back, or her siblings mumbling among themselves, as her eyes remained glued on the archway he had disappeared through. 

Rooted in her chair, it took her a few seconds to re-gather herself, as she jumped into action and went after him. Heart beating like it was going to jump out of her chest, the blood rising to her ears pumping with a deafening loudness. 

“Number Seven!” She vaguely heard their father growl. 

Running through the archway he had disappeared through, she went after him. She had to spot Five, had to stop him before he- 

Seven almost toppled over when her feet stepped out of the opened academy door Five had left wide open, as a needle-sharp pain stabbed her head, the pain reverberating through her entire body.

With the world moving around her as dizziness took her, Seven leaned against the doorway, breath shaky, vision becoming blurry. 

For a second she was confused, unsure where the sudden pain had come from until she searched for Five in her head and came up empty. 

It was like her heart was wrenched from her chest. 

Eyes wide, and breathing quickening, making her lungs burn, she searched for the connection, but it wasn’t there, there was  _ nothing _ . When she shut her side of the connection off, or Five did, there was still the slight humming. She could still feel him, albeit behind a wall, but now there wasn’t even that. There was no soft humming, no wall, nothing. It’s like he ceased to exist. He was there for a second, in her mind, taking up the spot inside her that belonged to him, her other part of herself and then he wasn’t, leaving her empty. 

Inside her, it was like her soul desperately searched for its other half, but there was nothing to answer its call. It was the most painful thing she had ever felt before.

Knees buckling, she fell to her knees, tears forming in her eyes. 

Seven understood then what it was like to not just lose someone but to lose the other part of herself. What it felt to have her soul cut in half. 


End file.
